So when I was little, like really little, I would go to the store with my Mom. For whatever reason I always seemed to wonder off, looking for what, I’m not sure. My Mom told me that one time she lost track of me and found me in the middle of those clothing roundabouts hiding. I also recall that once she got tired of looking for me, she would say “OK, I’m going to just leave you here.” Generally that was followed by me making an appearance and begging her not to leave me. This is a psycho drama I’ve seen played out with other children, it’s something that happens everyday.
As I have taken this giant leap to quit my job, take care of my health and write a dating book, I have a tinge of that feeling of being left behind again. There is still this part of me that is scared I have caused myself to be “left behind”. I am afraid that I will suddenly “come to my senses” and say oh my god what have I done and then feel I have to scramble to play catch up with the world and try to pick up where I left off. That feeling is a problem.
Me having these doubts and fears is SO VERY counter productive to what I am trying to achieve. As long as I give those fears power, they win. It makes the work I need to do to achieve my dreams even harder. No bueno. This little psychological loophole I have left myself is really my Achilles heal.
So here is the deal Doubt, I’m leaving you here. I have no room for you anymore. You served me well in the past and kept me safe and for that I am thankful. But now you hold me back, with “safe” decisions based on fear and doubt. My life is going to be lived to the fullest and it may take some scary moments and growing pains. That is all necessary in this process. But that challenge is the only way I can move forward, move ahead and actualize my full potential.
Breathe. Focus. Ignite.